After being discharged from hospital and having been sent back to the mental institution I attempted suicide in two days earlier, I still have a massive headache and feel majorly nauseous. But I guess I deserve it.
It’s a weird feeling. On the one hand I feel guilty for purposely putting my body through the intoxication; on the other hand I feel nothing but indifference. I somehow don’t regret what I was doing. I don’t really wish that I was dead right now, I don’t want to be alive either.
"I am almost equal to a shadow."
Thanks for your sweet words. I’m always here for you too. Stay strong. X x x PS I’m loving your blog!
War mein Leben lang ein Kämpfer,
habe nie aufgehört zu kämpfen,
doch die Kraft mich vor mir selber zu verstecken reicht nicht mehr aus,
ich habe genug gekämpft.
I:Where am I?
Doctor:You're in a hospital. You tried to kill yourself yesterday morning.
Today, the 6th of March 2014, I signed my first anti-suicide-contract with my therapist.
After the lorazepam intoxication and having spent the day/night in the intensive care unit I still feel dizzy, nauseous and have a monstrous headache. But hey, all my negative thoughts are gone. I feel like a brainless zombie.
I gave in and took 19mg of Tavor to stop the demons and to ease the pain.
"When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves."
Zopiclone:sweet dreams my dear...
"Waking up in a mental hospital isn’t something you plan for."